Three Little Piggies

Today we have pig races in protest of a mosque, the wife of Tiger Woods in pig, and confirmation that Mike Tyson is still a pig.

--A man unhappy with an Islamic association's plans to build a mosque next to his property has staged pig races as a protest during afternoon prayers.

Craig Baker, 46, sold merchandise and grilled sausages Friday for about 100 people who showed up in heavy rain. He insisted he wasn't trying to offend anyone with the pigs, which are forbidden from the Muslim diet.--

Guess you showed them. Except they didn't give a shit, and they weren't trying to take your property.

Only in Texas.

NEXT!

--Tiger Woods celebrated his 31st birthday Saturday by sharing some of his biggest news of the year -- his wife is expecting their first child this summer.

"Obviously, we couldn't be happier and our families are thrilled," Woods said on his Web site. "I have always wanted to be a dad. I just wish my father could be around to share the experience."

Woods and Elin Nordegren of Sweden married in October 2004, and Woods has said that he wanted children sooner instead of later. He did not say when in the summer the baby is due, although it likely would be between the U.S. Open and British Open.--

Tiger, don't take this wrong, but your dad was kind of an ass. I know you miss him, but your kid will be fine without him. Unless you decide to be an ass of a father too.

Congrats on the excellent scheduling, so if all goes as planned, you won't have to pay a bit of attention to your wife through her whole pregnancy.

Just so you know, your wife is totally hot. I'd give her a swedish massage without expecting a thing in return.

Then I'd beat off to the memories for the rest of my life.

--Mike Tyson was ordered released without bond on a felony drug possession charge Friday after an early-morning arrest in which Buckeye police said they found two bags of white powder in his back pocket.

"He said he was an addict and had a problem," according to a police probable cause statement filed in Maricopa County Superior Court. "He admitted possessing the bags of cocaine, and said he uses it anytime he can get his hands on it."--

The beauty queen raping, ear-biting sociopath still has a drug problem. No. Please, say it isn't so.

What a pig.