I Wanna Scrag A Rev'nuer

Today's bold statement: I don't think it should be against the law to take a shotgun to an employee of the Internal Revenue Service. Hell, I'm even in favor of cancelling several at a time.

There's a reason those fuckers are so hated, and it's not because people don't like paying usurious taxes. I mean, they don't, but the taxes in and of themselves aren't enough to provoke bloodshed. No, that comes from dealing with the agency's employees, the rev'nuers.

There's a few basic qualifications to become a rev'nuer. You must have an IQ of 90 or less. You must enjoy torturing puppies and kittens. You must be deaf and blind. And you have to be completely without a heart and a soul.

I'm a moose, so I don't pay taxes. But my people do, and they regularly get ass-raped with a watermelon by the rev'nuers. It just doesn't seem right. Think about it. All the retard rev'nuers have to say is, "You owe us this money," and they can take it from you by a levy, a garnishment, or just plain old stealing your stuff.

With every other kind of deal where you owe someone money, you gotta go to court. A Judge has to do what judges do... Enter a judgement. Then whoever that judgement is in favor of can go after your ass(ets).

This is America. That's the way we do things.

Except when it comes to the bottom-feeding rev'nuers, that is. Those guys don't need a warrant to look at your financial records. They don't need a judgement against you to take what's yours. They don't need anything but their retarded selves and their piss-awful attitude and their larceny-oriented mindset.

Every last one of those fuckers deserves to end up bleeding to death on the floor.

But I'm a law-abiding moose, so I'll have to settle for getting a few of them fired.

I swear, though, I'm not going to get a chubby again untile we have a flat tax, and every one of those bloodless assclowns ends up working the fryers at Pud Burger.