It's The Economy, Stupid!

I buy Playboy for the articles.

Okay, no I don't. I buy it for the pictures of naked chicks. But the articles really are usually pretty good too. They tend to have a very liberty-oriented slant.

Of course, every once in a while they fuck it up so royally that I fear their next centerfold is going to be Nancy Pelosi. And the March issue contains one of those leftwardly stupid fuck-ups.

The Playboy folks assembled an august panel (you have to pronounce it ah-GOOSED in a snotty, pretentious voice to capture the essence of exactly how special these dudes are) of putative experts to talk about the the economy.

Their names are Robert H. Frank, David Sirota, Paul Stiles, and Louis Uchitelle. Their credentials range from university professor at Cornell (where any thought to the right of Che Guevara is considered reactionary conservatism), to writer for the New York Times, that agenda-less bastion of objectivity.

*snicker*

Now, discussing the economy is kind of like believing in Jesus - you start with a conclusion, then bend the facts to fit. When you're talking about Jesus, that's totally harmless. When you're dealing with the economy, though, it gets sort of scary.

Ronald Reagan presided over a period of great prosperity, in spite of having inherited Jimmy Carter's fucked up economy. He accomplished this by lowering the marginal rate on "the wealthy," and pumping up the levels of government contracts in the defense arena and what not.

You can say what you want about The Gipper, and the Greedy 80s, but it was a good time for pretty much everybody in the country. Yet this magical time is roundly criticized by the eco-freaks of the round table. Yes, the middle class did better, but... GASP! The rich got even richerer!

The econ-augusts have similar criticisms of the current economy. Yes, unemployment is low, and so are interest rates, putting home ownership at an all-time high. But it's all wrong and bad, because the rich are getting richerer still!

Their solution to stifling all this prosperity is to adopt a more european economic model, including "free" healthcare for everyone, and steeply progressive taxes.

Yes, that should really help. I mean, employers in europe have the government so far up their ass regulating them, that unemployment is extremely high, and new job creation is almost non-existent. Why on earth would we not want to emulate such a perfect situation?

And their big bad over-taxed selves do not have a better standard of living than we do. They just redistribute the mediocrity more evenly. America is the only country in the world where "poverty" is having a 19" television instead of a big-screen.

And I guess people don't really grasp that "free" universal health care means you'll pay more in taxes, but get less in services. Gone will be those expensive, exotic procedures that your employer-provided insurance used to cover, unless you can afford to pay for it yourself.

I mean, Uncle Sam will become a giant HMO. And HMOs are charged with minimizing costs. So if, say, you lop your arm off with a chainsaw, your "free" health care won't pony up the tens of thousands of dollars for the micro-surgery to sew it back on. They'll just make sure you have a nice stump.

Is this really what you folks want? REALLY? Or would you rather have the opportunity to find an employment situation where the company-provided insurance agrees that the less cost-effective solution is more, oh, I don't know, humane?

And let's take a moment to address the eco-gurus' observation that lifespans in the United States are actually falling. They want you to jump to the conclusion that this is because of inadequate access to medical care.

Except, that would be the wrong conclusion. The reality of the situation is, America has the most advanced technology of any country in the world, and the vastest array of pharmaceuticals to cure all your ills. Yet people's lives are getting shorter. Why?

Well, mostly because in this country, even the poor people have enough money to clog their arteries, ruin their livers, and give themselves lung cancer. And all this fancy modern medicine can ameliorate (Rhymes with masturbate! Everybody drink!) the effects of a lifestyle full of shitty choices, but it can't completely undo the onslaught.

So people die younger, fatter, and sicker, all because they can afford a cheeseburger, a fifth of bourbon, and a pack of unfiltered Camels.

Anyway...

Contrary to what the econ-augusts say, the market always speaks. And when the powers that be tighten down the screws too much in this country, all those free-spirited entrepreneurial Americans fight back.

Which leads me to the one thing the econo-dudes got right in their little conversation:

Political results are bought and paid for. And who has the money to buy those results? Why, gee. The very same "evil corporations" that our leftist friends want "the government" to micro-manage.

I rest my case.

I'm a moose, with nothing in the way of formal education. It's amazing to me that what I see clearly is a mystery to all those PhD types.

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