Friends In Need, And The Agony Of The Sea

Let's talk about crabs.

No, not the social infestation that involved bugs in your pubes. The other kind of crabs, that are a multi-million dollar catch from the Bering Sea every year.

I write about dance reality shows a lot. But my newest reality show addiction has nothing to do with dance, unless you count the dance between man and nature.

The name of the show is Deadliest Catch. It's about those crazy motherfuckers who make sure you have King crab and snow crab available at your local Safeway and your favorite restaurant. It's a raw, gritty, intense, very exciting show. And I will wax philosophical about the highlights and lowlights another time.

For today, I'm going to talk about the friendship and comraderie of the fishermen. It's relevant to my life because right now, friendship is relevant to my life, and to the life of my big-titted secretary.

There's nothing wrong with being a friend in need; with asking for help with those things that are hosing up your life in a big way. Last night on Deadliest Catch, the boats got the call that some random boat, having nothing to do with the crab fishing, had capsized in the bad weather.

And strangely, miraculously, the fishing boats that were close by dropped everything they were doing, and went to help the Coast Guard find the ice cube floaters, hoping and praying to find them alive.

This is powerful stuff, folks. Potentially giving up thousands of dollars worth of crab, to assist in the search for men you don't even know.

But that's what friendship is. Every man who has ever faced down the menace of an angry ocean is a friend in spirit to every other man who has done that. It is a powerful, deep, almost mythical bond. And not one man who was anywhere near available to help betrayed that bond.

They understood that when a friend needs help, you do whatever is in your power to help them. If you have what they require, you give it, no questions asked. Whether it's just your eyes scanning the sea, your time at the expense of your bank balance, or just a hug when they are cold and hurting, you give it.

If you can't find it in your heart to do that, then you are not their friend. And you are not worthy to sail the same seas as the men who know the meaning of the word "friendship." For as the old aphorism goes, a friend in need is a friend indeed.

I raise my antlers to every true friend I've ever had, and every true friend my big-titted secretary has ever had. Friendship is a gift, and it's also a two-way street. Treasure your friends, even when they need you. Especially when they need you. Because you never know when you might need THEM.

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